I just read my last blog post and I must say that the pain of cancer was definitely on my mind that day. Those painful memories surface every now and then. They are a reminder of where we were and how far we have come today. My husband and I are both survivors. Cancer does not discriminate against any person or caregiver. It can happen to the wealthiest, the poorest, any race, or religion. I think every family has someone who has been affected. We must not let cancer stop us from what we are meant to do. Life is beautiful and we must continue with what ever our purpose is suppose to be. A survivor plans to waste no time living and seeing the beauty of life.
When I have read about the survivorship plan for all cancer patients and some other articles about what a cancer survivor is, I realized that my husband and I created our own plan. It started with a trip six years ago across the country to get a second opinion. Then we accepted the plan for treatment and we knew exactly what we expected from others. There were days when we were not happy with the attitude of people who were caring for my husband. I must remind us both that we are not responsible for their actions, however we are responsible for how we react to them. We had to say that we did not want some of them on our team to beat cancer. We literally had to voice our desires several times over a three year span. These people were what we called disgruntled workers and they had no problem letting us know. We have since found out that we were at a cancer center during a time of many changes with new leadership and spending cuts. We witnessed protest outside the building on one occasion. We should not have had to deal with the retaliation of others. We were there paying for the excellent care that was being advertised It was our life and we were going to fight for it regardless if someone had their feelings hurt. I think in the situation as a cancer patient we would all want compassion and a doctor who would work with us to get the best quality of life. It is not wise for doctors to control patients, but lead them to the best resources to help them. Change is hard for anyone but when you are ill it is one more burden on top of a mountain of many changes. Deciphering through all the emotional changes, life style changes, and developing a trusting relationship with a new health team is very overwhelming. Some people adapt well and others take a bit more time. We are of course all unique and certainly individually our needs are different. The patient should never have to bear the burden of disgruntled workers.
Our survivorship plan after cancer treatment consisted of my husband and I seeking help from other doctors to try and undo the emotional mess we had lived through. There was no time to waste fighting for others to help. It is never easy finding new doctors and making sure they understand your medical history and entrusting our life to them. We are still working on that. We had to fire a few along the way. We did not sit back and let the downfall of what we lived through stop us from making our own survivorship plan. We take one day at a time. Each day starts with a kiss and a note to each other as we awake at different times. The notes are a reminder of love that had endured a painful past. We fill each day with activities that are fulling our dreams. We are reminded that every day is a gift and it is not always as planned. We hold our heads high and help others navigate their way through the health care system. Our mistakes are their gains. We hope that the disgruntled health care workers realize that their attitudes affect the lives of people trying to survive. They too some day may be the patient, so do unto others as you wish to be treated.
God Bless as cancer patients and caregivers !! We are survivors !!!
Life is beautiful !
Elizabeth:)
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