Today is a beautiful fall day and we are going to have what is called Indian summer. The next few days and next week are suppose to be warm and sunny. I am excited that my husband is coming home early to enjoy part of the day. The daylight hours are getting shorter now and it is difficult to get outside once he gets home from work during the week. All the trees are a multitude of orange, red and purple. A beautiful time of the year to enjoy before winter.
Yesterday I said I would continue to tell my story of how I got to this point in life where I am feeling good and healthy again. It is not just one single thing that brought me to this place in life. If I had to choose one single event in life that brought me to realize my health was important, it would be cancer. I didn't have cancer, but it seemed as if every one I love so much did. So what happens when a family member gets cancer, fear sets in. Your life is no longer the same and the whole family dynamic changes. All of the sudden the body goes into one of the greatest shocks. The person with cancer is in shock, his spouse and children are in shock and everyone who is close to them is in shock.
After living through what I have over the past 4 years I can tell you I know a lot about what STRESS does to the body. It is especially bad when you get stuck in a viscous cycle of stress and fear. If there is not a good support team in place it is awful. Until you actually live it or they say walk in the shoes of a cancer patient, do not judge them. I don't care how far advanced we come with cancer treatment, we all know that sometimes the cancer wins. It has been wonderful that my husband is still here 17 years later, but that fear of the cancer returning always lurks in our mind. So seriously stress has caused other health problems.
I have since 2010 realized that not only was my husband stressed out, but I was I trembling with fear. The love of my life was sick again and I was not feeling too well myself. I tried to hide how bad I felt as not to worry anyone else. I was so wrapped up in trying to help my husband that I forgot about helping myself.
As time went on and my husband started treatment for cancer I continued to feel sub par. It was not until we came home from Texas in the fall of 2011 that I realized that I was not myself and feeling like I could just take my last breath. I was tired beyond belief, my heart was pounding and my cognitive functioning was shot. November of that year was probably the lowest point of my life. And as if a land slide had happened I would say it only got worst. That is when I turned to the therapist back here in the north. Winter was coming and my husband was having great difficulty with cognitive problems and I was diagnosed with situational anxiety. It took awhile for therapy to calm me down, but the stress of cancer continued to haunt us. And without any support it turned into a cycle of ups and down. And, it finally climaxed in November of 2013 when I had one of the worst panic attacks ever and became ill. I had that attack right in front of my husband's doctor who exited the room and offered no help from the social work department or other staff. He even grinned, as he said you are having a panic attack. It left me with a very disgusted opinion of what the medical profession has become. And as time went on, it took my therapist awhile to convince me that there are still good physicians in the world. You have to advocate for yourself and loved ones to find those who will help.
With the encouragement of the social worker here at home and the concern that she had for my well being, she helped me and my husband realize that if we are not happy with a doctor then we need to move on. It is very important that you have good communication with your health care team. You need their support and direction to heal the body and the mind.
I followed the therapist's advice and started to advocate for myself to get well. The sad part is that even though I felt bad, the standard medical test done at my physical exams came back normal and I was dismissed with an antidepressant. A pill which caused many other problems until I finally said enough is enough and weaned myself off them. Then I decided with the help of a friend to see someone who practiced functional medicine. She herself had had some similar problems and they had been willing to do some test that a lot of doctors won't do because of insurance.
I seemed to get sicker by the days, as time went on and I felt exhausted. The love that I had for bicycling and walking, etc., had become a chore. Then as if by a miracle I heard an advertisement about a group of women health care professionals who had dedicated themselves to women's health and I called immediately. The very next day my life started to change. It has also changed my husband's life as we have both learned what continuous stress does to the body. I will stop now, as it is time to enjoy this beautiful day with my husband.
My message today is be your own advocate and if you know something is not right with your body keep searching for someone to help you. You deserve good health care.
Elizabeth:)
Friday, October 24, 2014
Thursday, October 23, 2014
Standing Up For Our Health
I was smiling in the mirror today as I dried my hair, and all of the sudden I realized it was because I felt so good. The best I have felt in years. I have finally reached a turning point in my life where some things I have been doing for myself have started to pay off. It reminded me that we are responsible for our own health. I finally realized a year ago that I am worthy of taking care of myself. I had become lost in the stress of taking care of everyone else and landed myself in a dark hole. I was feeling so badly that I had prayed to God to let me go. I know it sounds awful, but I was in a lot of pain and exhausted. I had one of my doctors tell me it was just suppose to be that way, because I am a woman. I said good-bye to that doctor and thank you God for the strength to say that.
Yesterday I was expressing my opinion about the the rising cost of health insurance and how the average American is finding it hard to keep up with. I have never agreed with health insurance dictating our health care. I am a little rebel as my mother always said. I am glad that I did learn to think outside the box. It has led me to a healthier and better life.
Of course, this blog is my opinions and my story. I believe that people can believe what they want, but if something is not working for you, then it is time to move on and not give up. The people who are successful are the ones who did not except no, when their theories or ideas where shot down. They stood up and kept pushing forward and fighting against the Naye Sayers.
I am not against medical doctors or modern medicine, but I do not believe in an insurance company dictating what my treatment is going to be based upon, because of protocols or norms. I am an individual and my medical needs are not just based on giving me a pill to stop a symptom. There is a reason you don't feel good and I don't want an insurance company to tell me they won't let a doctor run a test, because it does not fall under a certain criteria.
Yesterday I talked about the insurance company not paying for ninety percent of my health care last year. I will tell you the truth is that I decided my life was worth more than the insurance plan. I stepped out of the network and found some health care professionals that have decided not to take insurance. They are board certified doctors who are willing to use integrated or some call it functional medicine to help people. They took the time to run some test and listen to me talk about my symptoms. There were some test that I was told by my other doctors that they could not run because of insurance company regulations. I had to pay for the test out of my own pocket, but it was the best money I ever spent.
Bingo, they found out what was wrong with me. Some things that could be corrected with supplements and some prescriptions that were tailored made for me. We are all unique and one standard pill from a drug company does not cure everybody.
I ended up in the long run not paying as much out of pocket as I would have with the insurance company and I feel good. Yes there are people that will disagree with me, and doctors will continue to be pressured by insurance companies that push them to see too many patients a day and prescribe pills because of the pressure from drug companies. I just choose not to participate in the insurance companies protocol. I will continue to see doctors under my insurance plan for yearly physicals and catastrophic things that have the potential to happen in life. There are of course good doctors who are trying to stay afloat in our greedy health care system. I can assure you that a lot of them are not getting rich either from our broken down health care system. It will take a stance from the doctors and from the patients to stop insurance companies from dictating our fate.
Tomorrow I'll let you know what actually was the turning point for me to finally realize that I needed to stand up for myself. I need to go for now, as the sun is shining and I am feeling too good to waste a beautiful fall day. Blessings and hugs to all.
Life is beautiful !!
Elizabeth:)
Yesterday I was expressing my opinion about the the rising cost of health insurance and how the average American is finding it hard to keep up with. I have never agreed with health insurance dictating our health care. I am a little rebel as my mother always said. I am glad that I did learn to think outside the box. It has led me to a healthier and better life.
Of course, this blog is my opinions and my story. I believe that people can believe what they want, but if something is not working for you, then it is time to move on and not give up. The people who are successful are the ones who did not except no, when their theories or ideas where shot down. They stood up and kept pushing forward and fighting against the Naye Sayers.
I am not against medical doctors or modern medicine, but I do not believe in an insurance company dictating what my treatment is going to be based upon, because of protocols or norms. I am an individual and my medical needs are not just based on giving me a pill to stop a symptom. There is a reason you don't feel good and I don't want an insurance company to tell me they won't let a doctor run a test, because it does not fall under a certain criteria.
Yesterday I talked about the insurance company not paying for ninety percent of my health care last year. I will tell you the truth is that I decided my life was worth more than the insurance plan. I stepped out of the network and found some health care professionals that have decided not to take insurance. They are board certified doctors who are willing to use integrated or some call it functional medicine to help people. They took the time to run some test and listen to me talk about my symptoms. There were some test that I was told by my other doctors that they could not run because of insurance company regulations. I had to pay for the test out of my own pocket, but it was the best money I ever spent.
Bingo, they found out what was wrong with me. Some things that could be corrected with supplements and some prescriptions that were tailored made for me. We are all unique and one standard pill from a drug company does not cure everybody.
I ended up in the long run not paying as much out of pocket as I would have with the insurance company and I feel good. Yes there are people that will disagree with me, and doctors will continue to be pressured by insurance companies that push them to see too many patients a day and prescribe pills because of the pressure from drug companies. I just choose not to participate in the insurance companies protocol. I will continue to see doctors under my insurance plan for yearly physicals and catastrophic things that have the potential to happen in life. There are of course good doctors who are trying to stay afloat in our greedy health care system. I can assure you that a lot of them are not getting rich either from our broken down health care system. It will take a stance from the doctors and from the patients to stop insurance companies from dictating our fate.
Tomorrow I'll let you know what actually was the turning point for me to finally realize that I needed to stand up for myself. I need to go for now, as the sun is shining and I am feeling too good to waste a beautiful fall day. Blessings and hugs to all.
Life is beautiful !!
Elizabeth:)
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
Affordable Health Care?
My husband and I keep facing more and more financial challenges, as we were just graced with new monthly premiums and out of pocket expense for health insurance starting in 2015. Since the year 2010 the out of pocket expense has more than doubled per individual. The monthly premiums has gone up twenty three percent. People who have Cancer or any long term illness are feeling the crunch of the high deductibles and out of pocket limit. We are penalized if we do not have insurance and we are penalized for using the insurance we have. A representative from the insurance company stated that the big increase was due to the amount of company health claims. I know that made my husband feel scrunitized, as we have had to use our insurance quite a bit over the last couple of years.
It is heart breaking enough to face all the challenges of cancer, let alone trying to battle the insurance company. We have been really making a conscience effort to stay healthy and having our yearly physicals. Although, we all know that all it takes is one unforeseen medical accident or illness that could wipe out an average family savings. I can tell you that health care is not affordable.
I spent the last year myself with many health problems and the insurance company denied ninety percent of the claims, stating that they were not covered by the insurance plan. It would be awful to say that my husband was lucky that his Cancer care was covered by insurance. I say awful, because it is awful that anyone has cancer. Yet we are amongst those that have been blessed that the insurance payed for his care once we payed the out of pocket expense. The out of pocket expense now is getting out of control and too much for an average American family.
Our fear now is deciding who gets health care in the year that lies ahead. No question asked, it will be my husband. We will be hesitant to use the insurance other than for preventive care that falls under the one hundred percent paid for, such as yearly physicals, flu shots, and etc. The affordable health care has left us not wondering if we will have to file bankruptcy, but when we will have too.
So much for the golden years as we age. We will persevere and pray that we win the lottery. For now we eat healthy, exercise every day and feel the blessings of how lucky we were to have had an affordable insurance plan.
Yes, Life is still beautiful and we are not letting an insurance company take it away!
Elizabeth :)
It is heart breaking enough to face all the challenges of cancer, let alone trying to battle the insurance company. We have been really making a conscience effort to stay healthy and having our yearly physicals. Although, we all know that all it takes is one unforeseen medical accident or illness that could wipe out an average family savings. I can tell you that health care is not affordable.
I spent the last year myself with many health problems and the insurance company denied ninety percent of the claims, stating that they were not covered by the insurance plan. It would be awful to say that my husband was lucky that his Cancer care was covered by insurance. I say awful, because it is awful that anyone has cancer. Yet we are amongst those that have been blessed that the insurance payed for his care once we payed the out of pocket expense. The out of pocket expense now is getting out of control and too much for an average American family.
Our fear now is deciding who gets health care in the year that lies ahead. No question asked, it will be my husband. We will be hesitant to use the insurance other than for preventive care that falls under the one hundred percent paid for, such as yearly physicals, flu shots, and etc. The affordable health care has left us not wondering if we will have to file bankruptcy, but when we will have too.
So much for the golden years as we age. We will persevere and pray that we win the lottery. For now we eat healthy, exercise every day and feel the blessings of how lucky we were to have had an affordable insurance plan.
Yes, Life is still beautiful and we are not letting an insurance company take it away!
Elizabeth :)
Sunday, October 12, 2014
A Life Script For Happiness
The past few days I have been reading about the things that people do that make them happy. They are easy things that we can all practice in our daily routine and they won't cost you any money. It will take a few minutes of your time each day and the pay off is worth it. One of those things is writing daily about what you are grateful for. I started doing this a couple of years ago when a social worker introduced me to the daily gratitude of Louise Hay. It has become a daily habit and it does help fill you mind with pleasant things to get through stressful events in our life. I am not saying that life is always going to be like a box of chocolates, but gratitude helps you focus on things that send happy thoughts to our brain.
The other thing that happy people do is rewrite their life script. In the social world of therapy it is called cognitive behavior therapy. You talk about those things from your past that are constantly upsetting your mind and you turn the events into a positive thought. I realize now that my therapist was a smart lady, as she shifted all my bad and traumatic events from my childhood to all the good things about the childhood. I won't tell you that I don't still have triggers that remind me of trauma from the past, but I stop the thought with a shift to the fun things in my life.
I need to rewrite the script from my husband's experience with cancer, and all the others in my life that have died from cancer. I realized this the other day as I remembered that my mother had constantly told me that I too would die some day just the way she did, and so would my husband. It sounds awful, but the fact of it is that our brain starts to believe things that we hear constantly. We actually do control our life script.
I am about to rewrite mine. When I think about my children, I helped write my daughter's script. I told her all the time what a beautiful, smart and friendly person she was while growing up. She is grown now and every bit of the person I painted her to be. She is very successful and loved by many people.
So how do I see myself, I see my self as growing gracefully old and living a life filled with love. The real me sees myself as an artist. I have been told by many friends that I am very artistic and I am starting to see that side of myself again. I had buried that part of my life, but I like that person and that is a very big part of me. I have found joy again in sewing and can see myself very happily with my own boutique. And of course my husband will be a part of the boutique, because he loves to talk to people. Mr. Sociable loves being surrounded by people and would make an excellent sales clerk.
Okay My husband is calling for dinner and I must stop here today. Pick up a pencil and write three things you are grateful for. Keep doing it everyday and soon your mind will be filled with happiness.
Life is beautiful !!
Elizabeth:)
The other thing that happy people do is rewrite their life script. In the social world of therapy it is called cognitive behavior therapy. You talk about those things from your past that are constantly upsetting your mind and you turn the events into a positive thought. I realize now that my therapist was a smart lady, as she shifted all my bad and traumatic events from my childhood to all the good things about the childhood. I won't tell you that I don't still have triggers that remind me of trauma from the past, but I stop the thought with a shift to the fun things in my life.
I need to rewrite the script from my husband's experience with cancer, and all the others in my life that have died from cancer. I realized this the other day as I remembered that my mother had constantly told me that I too would die some day just the way she did, and so would my husband. It sounds awful, but the fact of it is that our brain starts to believe things that we hear constantly. We actually do control our life script.
I am about to rewrite mine. When I think about my children, I helped write my daughter's script. I told her all the time what a beautiful, smart and friendly person she was while growing up. She is grown now and every bit of the person I painted her to be. She is very successful and loved by many people.
So how do I see myself, I see my self as growing gracefully old and living a life filled with love. The real me sees myself as an artist. I have been told by many friends that I am very artistic and I am starting to see that side of myself again. I had buried that part of my life, but I like that person and that is a very big part of me. I have found joy again in sewing and can see myself very happily with my own boutique. And of course my husband will be a part of the boutique, because he loves to talk to people. Mr. Sociable loves being surrounded by people and would make an excellent sales clerk.
Okay My husband is calling for dinner and I must stop here today. Pick up a pencil and write three things you are grateful for. Keep doing it everyday and soon your mind will be filled with happiness.
Life is beautiful !!
Elizabeth:)
Tuesday, October 7, 2014
Shame On The Drug Companies
It has been raining now for the last two days and seems very dreary. The house was dark this morning as Laney and I ventured downstairs. No sun again means no walks outside. We woke up Saturday morning to a light dusting of snow on the ground and my husband and I kept staring at it from the upstairs window as if it was something foreign. Unfortunately, what we were looking at was snow. It melted quickly, but it is not a good sign to have snow early October. The weather drastically changed from last week. All I can say is yuck, and when is the first airplane flight south.
We managed to get a walk in Sunday evening before dark, as the gale force winds earlier in the day had died down. I left the television on, as it had been on most of the day for Sunday football. When we arrived back at the house, I went inside just in time to hear the words MD Anderson. I called to my husband to come quick and listen. The television show 60 Minutes was on. They were interviewing a doctor from MD Anderson about the astronomical cost of chemotherapy drugs.
It seems these days that our research for drugs to extend cancer patients lives is happening, but the cost of the drug is not affordable to the average American. I was angry and saddened to hear that patients are dying, because they can not afford the drugs. The drug companies have raised the price on some drugs yearly to the point they are extremely beyond affordable. I felt sick to my stomach and wondered how we have become a country of greed. Everything is driven by who can make the greatest profit even at the expense of some one's life. The expense of testing and seeing doctors is enough financial heartache let alone someone telling you your medication may cost one hundred thousand a year if you want a chance at living.
I was happy to hear that the doctors are trying to petition the drug companies to lower the cost. I guess we will all have to start writing our congressmen to see what we can do. The Moon Shots program to reduce mortality in cancer patients at MD Anderson may sound great, but the cost of treatment will only be for the select wealthy. Who can sleep at night knowing some one's loved one died because money is of more importance than life. Shame on the drug companies. It is discouraging to know that we donate to research to fund new drugs only to find out we can't afford them.
I sat and listened and then God caught my tear drops and there was silence in the room, as my husband exited the room. The 60 Minutes interview was over, but I hope the battle has begun to stop the drug companies from deciding who gets to live.
Thank you doctors at MD Anderson for fighting for cancer patients.
Life is beautiful !!
Elizabeth:)
We managed to get a walk in Sunday evening before dark, as the gale force winds earlier in the day had died down. I left the television on, as it had been on most of the day for Sunday football. When we arrived back at the house, I went inside just in time to hear the words MD Anderson. I called to my husband to come quick and listen. The television show 60 Minutes was on. They were interviewing a doctor from MD Anderson about the astronomical cost of chemotherapy drugs.
It seems these days that our research for drugs to extend cancer patients lives is happening, but the cost of the drug is not affordable to the average American. I was angry and saddened to hear that patients are dying, because they can not afford the drugs. The drug companies have raised the price on some drugs yearly to the point they are extremely beyond affordable. I felt sick to my stomach and wondered how we have become a country of greed. Everything is driven by who can make the greatest profit even at the expense of some one's life. The expense of testing and seeing doctors is enough financial heartache let alone someone telling you your medication may cost one hundred thousand a year if you want a chance at living.
I was happy to hear that the doctors are trying to petition the drug companies to lower the cost. I guess we will all have to start writing our congressmen to see what we can do. The Moon Shots program to reduce mortality in cancer patients at MD Anderson may sound great, but the cost of treatment will only be for the select wealthy. Who can sleep at night knowing some one's loved one died because money is of more importance than life. Shame on the drug companies. It is discouraging to know that we donate to research to fund new drugs only to find out we can't afford them.
I sat and listened and then God caught my tear drops and there was silence in the room, as my husband exited the room. The 60 Minutes interview was over, but I hope the battle has begun to stop the drug companies from deciding who gets to live.
Thank you doctors at MD Anderson for fighting for cancer patients.
Life is beautiful !!
Elizabeth:)
Friday, October 3, 2014
Light The Night 2014
Last night was a success for The Light The Night with LLS. There was a huge turnout for a great evening. We met up with some friends and it was great to see everyone that came out to support LLS. We carried lanterns this year instead of balloons. It looked really cool to see all the lanterns lit as we started to walk. I was happily walking with some people I love. What more could a girl ask for.
My husband raised over a thousand dollars. Thank you again to all that gave us donations. We still don't know the official final amount raised, but one company last night made a 63,000 dollar donation. Thank you! You put some big smiles on cancer patients and their families. They were glowing in the dark.
I'm keeping my word and wearing pink every day this month for breast cancer awareness. I counted up that I have about nine pink tops. I might have to add to my collection. There are no objections from my husband as he loves me in pink.
Remember no matter what month it is that cancer research needs funding. God bless all cancer patient and their families.
Life is beautiful!!
Elizabeth:)
I'm keeping my word and wearing pink every day this month for breast cancer awareness. I counted up that I have about nine pink tops. I might have to add to my collection. There are no objections from my husband as he loves me in pink.
Remember no matter what month it is that cancer research needs funding. God bless all cancer patient and their families.
Life is beautiful!!
Elizabeth:)
Thursday, October 2, 2014
Pink In Honor Of Breast Cancer Patients
It is hard to believe that October is already upon us. We awoke yesterday to the first day of October and the weather was appropriate for fall. It was very cool in the morning and I had to wear a coat as I ventured out. The leaves are all turning colors now and starting to fall. September quickly exited and so did our warm weather. I am going to try and enjoy as much time outside as possible before the snow starts to fall.
Today is partly sunny and a little warmer and we are getting psyched up for The Light The Night with The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. Thank you to all the employees that work with my husband for their generous donations. You bring a smile and hope to all blood cancer patients. We are suppose to have a beautiful evening for the walk. My husband and I are excited as we will be joined on the walk by our daughter and son-in-law.
Least we not forget that October is breast cancer awareness month. In honor of all who have battled breast cancer and those who have lost the battle, I am wearing something pink everyday. My mother-in-law passed away in 2006 from breast cancer. I thank God every day for the color pink. It is my favorite color, and I will be proud to wear it every day to bring awareness to breast cancer. Please remember to get your mammograms. If you can donate to cancer research so we can win the battle with cancer.
It is a sad week for my husband as he has lost a friend and co-worker to cancer. It is another reminder that we all need to keep donating to cancer research. Our love and prayers go to his family. He will be greatly missed by us, as he was an uplifting inspiration to my husband through all of his cancer treatment over the past three years. He corresponded with my husband through e-mails while we lived in Texas going through chemotherapy. His e-mails always brought a smile to my husband's face. He will not be forgotten by our family, but honored as a hero who fought a great battle. R.I.P.
I'll end this blog today with a plea to all to donate to cancer research and challenge you to wear pink for all the breast cancer patients. No matter what kind of cancer people have it is frightening and anything that we can do to help will make a difference. I am posting a picture today of something that has brought a smile to my face through the cancer journey with my husband. Hope it makes you smile. God Bless You All !!
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Life is beautiful!!
Elizabeth:)
Today is partly sunny and a little warmer and we are getting psyched up for The Light The Night with The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. Thank you to all the employees that work with my husband for their generous donations. You bring a smile and hope to all blood cancer patients. We are suppose to have a beautiful evening for the walk. My husband and I are excited as we will be joined on the walk by our daughter and son-in-law.
Least we not forget that October is breast cancer awareness month. In honor of all who have battled breast cancer and those who have lost the battle, I am wearing something pink everyday. My mother-in-law passed away in 2006 from breast cancer. I thank God every day for the color pink. It is my favorite color, and I will be proud to wear it every day to bring awareness to breast cancer. Please remember to get your mammograms. If you can donate to cancer research so we can win the battle with cancer.
It is a sad week for my husband as he has lost a friend and co-worker to cancer. It is another reminder that we all need to keep donating to cancer research. Our love and prayers go to his family. He will be greatly missed by us, as he was an uplifting inspiration to my husband through all of his cancer treatment over the past three years. He corresponded with my husband through e-mails while we lived in Texas going through chemotherapy. His e-mails always brought a smile to my husband's face. He will not be forgotten by our family, but honored as a hero who fought a great battle. R.I.P.
I'll end this blog today with a plea to all to donate to cancer research and challenge you to wear pink for all the breast cancer patients. No matter what kind of cancer people have it is frightening and anything that we can do to help will make a difference. I am posting a picture today of something that has brought a smile to my face through the cancer journey with my husband. Hope it makes you smile. God Bless You All !!
Elizabeth:)
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