Setting Aside Our Personal Differences

I awoke this morning to the telephone ringing and I answered it because the caller ID revealed it was a family member.  The phone call woke my brain up as I listened to the lovely voice of my daughter.  It was a wonderful wake up call, as I always love talking to my daughter.  She always brings a ray of sunshine to my life and she makes me grateful to be a mother.

My blog posting continues today with some more grateful things in my life.  The conversation with my daughter reminded me how grateful I am of my children and proud that they have grown up to display strong leadership skills and compassion for others.  Yes, I am proud to be their mother.

Our conversation left me wondering what has happened to our medical society.  I was shocked to hear how someone had been treated by some health care professionals.  Out of respect for those involved I will not say what happened, but an incident has left me feeling ashamed of nurses and doctors.  Being a nurse myself,  I am wondering what has happened to the oath that we took to care for people.  Are health care workers burned out?  Are they taking out their frustration on their patients, because of their dismay with the many changes in the health care system?

I did a lot of praying over the last several years because of my husband's health issues and the emotional toll it took on our family.  I am grateful to have been on the other side of the fence as a caregiver of  a spouse, because it made me really look at how the attitudes of nurses and doctors affect the patient.  After doing some research I am starting to understand that perhaps the change in administration at an institution plays a great role in the attitude projected to the patients.  No matter who is in charge we need as health care professionals to step back and remind ourselves the oath we took to care for our patients.  We are all human and come to work with our own set of values, but we need to remember that no matter how upset we are over changes we can not take it out on the patient and their families.

Several years ago I worked for a doctor that reminded the medical team that we were never to take out our problems on a patient.  She reminded us daily that no matter how bad we thought our day was that an ill person did not need to subjected to it.  She was very serious about it and our patients were always given good care.  I was proud to work with her.

This blog post has left me with an unpleasant memory of something that was said to my husband and I during an office visit.  We were told not to ask any questions, as the doctor was having a bad day.  My husband and I were upset, because my husband had some side effects and was feeling poorly.  He did not discuss them with the doctor for fear he was a burden.  I was upset as it is hard to watch a loved one deal with cancer.  I know that the doctor did not verbally say he was having a bad day, but his demeanor and the comment from his health care team left us both feeling apprehensive.  Once again as health care professionals we need to put aside our own personal problems and be there for our patients.  I still get sad sometimes when I remember how we did not speak up for fear of ruining the doctors already bad day. I spent many days punishing myself for not speaking up.  That day left us with worry and pain that we experienced daily, and those side effects challenged the whole dynamics of our family life.  I have prayed for the doctor, and hope he has good days for the other patients.  I hugged the doctor after each visit, because down deep inside of me I wondered if he was emotionally burned out. 

As we all know our actions come back to bite us, they call it karma.  We can change and forgive others and our self.  I have learned that it starts with taking care of our own health.  We need to remember that when we feel good then the others around us are happy.

Today I end with being grateful to be a mother.  I am also grateful that I am a nurse and for the patients who have taught me about compassion.   And last but not least I am grateful for Laney who loves me unconditionally and lets me talk without judgement.  There would be no blog without my spoiled four legged friend.  I love you Laney!!

Life is beautiful!!

Elizabeth:)